i'm calm
i'm not alone
i'm surrounded by friends
i know i am important

still i want to leave
still i want to fade away
still i want to disappear

i am exhausted
i don't want anyone to save me
i want someone to say to me that i am free to leave
not because they don't care
but because they know i'm reaching my breaking point
and because, after all, "there is no if, just this"